Symphony for breakfast

Ahh the symphony. All of the instruments collectively combine to provide the ear with a pleasing and unrelenting single sound or voice. This morning was no exception. However instead of trumpets and violins, I ate breakfast to the sounds of children screaming and parents scolding. Yesterday was the last day of school for the British school children and subsequently everywhere you look, children are out and about enjoying their summer holidays. Since Legoland is a fascinating attraction for these schoolchildren, the hotel that I am staying at has suddenly become overrun with these kids. Granted, I love children. They're fun and have a spirit that hasn't yet been squashed by years and years of "EAT YOUR PEAS". So it's a pleasant if not loud branch from my normal hotel mornings filled with business people in ties on their way to work. I literally felt as though I had stepped into an insane asylum... or more appropriately a zoo. In less than five minutes I overheard the following stern admonishments by parents while at the same time they were being drowned out by their 5 year-old's screaming lungs. It was a sight to witness for sure. And you know what happens when you get a lot of children around one another, they have to show off. So each table of children was trying to outdo the children's misbehavior next to them. It was hilarious. I am sure the parents are exhausted, but it was fun to watch.

"Do not try to trip people with your monster truck"
"That is not funny. You're not funny. Stop eating like a pig."
"Do not put the knife in your mouth. Do not put the knife in your nose!?! "
"Please sit down. Please stop. no. no. Please don't do that."
"Say thank you. No. Do not stick your tongue out at your sister. Say thank you. "
"Do not jump on the seats"
"Stop hitting each other"
"Please be nice to your sister."
"THIS IS NOT A ZOO! Stop swinging from the chair! You're going to break something. "

And then quietly, a break in the cacophony as a lone child was trying to take his crossiant to the table with the thongs in hand. Every two steps he would lose his grip and drop the crossiant. Then he would gingerly pick it back up and put it into the thongs before heading back to the table again. Drop. Stop. Pickup with Thongs. Step. Drop. Repeat. Over and over again. Then the noise level picked back up to its usual cresendo. It was literally like a small entertainment piece orchestrated for my very eyes. It's all in the perspective that you take, although I don't think the hotel staff was amused.

This also happens to be the same hotel that when I checked in yesterday didn't have power, no lifs in operation, and wouldn't for quite some time. Gotta love the rollercoaster ride of travelling. Carpe Diem!

Singing in the rain.... Or NOT

So I would just like to take this opportunity to thank KLM for their superior customer service skills. Recently on one of the 18 flights I have taken in the past 2 months, (ahem. Flight 1021 that left out of Amsterdam for Heathrow last Saturday), I had the extreme pleasure of dealing with KLM and their amazing customer service skills.

Upon arrival and checkin, I lug my 2 months supply of clothes and life's valuables onto the conveyor belt only to be told that I am 1kg over my 20kg weight limit. Considering I have made 17 flights without issue and haven't bought anything, I incredulously ask the flight chick what she wants me to do about that. She just sits there and blinks. *Blink* *Blink* I again repeat twice, what are my options? She says to me, "You're over your weight limit. *blink* *blink*"

Yes. No kidding. What do you want me to do about that? So I start to unpack my bag in front of her... Requiring everyone to queue up behind me. She just sits there as I figure out how to get 1kg of weight out of the bag. I then shove a couple of shirts into my purse that I have for the carry on and complete check in. She never said anything else. Just stared at me and blinked.

Then, as I am leaving Holland, the skies open and rain pours forth from the sky. Amsterdam is weeping that I'm leaving and decides to keep me in the airport for 45 minutes extra. Thankfully KLM decided to leave my bags out under the plane for the rain to soak through. Thank you KLM for your wonderful service. You are amazing at customer satisfaction for when I arrived at Heathrow, I discovered that my whole 2 months work of clothes, including my dry clean only business attire are all soaked through and have gotten the opportunity to mingle with oil slick sludge from under the airplane. INCREDIBLE. Pictures are provided below as I took a picture when the rain started letting up of our bags left outside the airplane on the ground during the downpour.



Thank you again KLM - Your loyal customer

Grace Kelley Look out

Well it's known the world over that I lack grace, especially when faced with physically managing multiple objects at once. Case in point, this morning at the hotel gym, I ever so graciously tried to do the double flip dismount from the stair stepper only to unceremoniously land on my left shoulder. I do not fall well. Bruises have manifested where once was beautiful white skin. Trying to manage the heart rate monitor, the headphones and mp3 player, hotel room key, and a towel was simply too much for this able bodied Texas girl to handle. Oh well. It was quite clumsy of me but at least no one saw. Hopefully. I took the tape from the hotel security staff to ensure my integrity stays in tact.
An even scarier thought is that I have been driving in the UK for 2 days now ON THE LEFT HAND SIDE OF THE ROAD WITH ROUNDABOUTS without incident. Touch wood.... no not that kind.. the real kind.

Hotel, sweet hotel

Throughout my travels here in Holland, one thing has been predictable. I will get lost. No sense of direction or ability to read maps will assist me in my inevitable position. Lost. I am. But if I keep moving, I find my way. Throughout Eindhoven, Utrecht, and Amersfoot travels, roundabouts and misplaced/hard to read signs in Dutch contribute to this lost state of mind. It's positively the most out of place feeling to know you are lost in a foreign country without a single Clue as to where you actually are. So you just keep moving and then before your eyes, the hotel appears on the left. Trust your instincts and ask for directions. But keep moving on. Holland's a great place to discover these little tidbits.

Alternatively, once you arrive at the 3 or 5 star hotel with gourmet breakfast, lavish reception rooms, business centers, and comfortable style, you will only be disappointed at what they consider 5 star service. Overall the beds and rooms have been comfortable. They're pragmatic and convenient. But the other amenities like Internet access and elevators tend to be inconsistently inoperable. It makes for a roller coaster ride to see if the next hotel, the next destination has air conditioned rooms (due to the aforementioned heat wave), high speed Internet access that WORKS, and elevators or lifts. Their version of breakfast is also suspect with weird sausages and eggs. Most have the European style breakfasts of cold meats and cheeses which I have learned to appreciate at the beginning of my day. It's always an adventure here in paradise.

Flying back to London where I will be lost AND driving on the wrong side of the road. Fear me.

Heat Wave

So my friend, partner in crime, and awesome bassist Damian has been whining about Texas being hot. Well. Darlin. You're in TEXAS. You know this about Texas. It gets that way every year. Stop your bitchin. It's how the world turns. HOWEVER, I would like to say that Holland and the UK are NOT used to such high temperatures and are experiencing record heat waves right now in the 30+ (98F+) temperature zones. Couple that with the fact that most areas here don't have A/C and you have some very sweaty, dehydrated, weed smokin, sex having hippies on your hand. Seriously folks. This heat has got to go. Of course I am now being blamed for bringing in the hotness. I can't help it, I'm smokin hot! Heat waves just bask in my glory and arrive in my wake!

Today, one of the customers remarked, "Well it wasn't this hot before you got here, so I blame you. It must of been your rays of sunshine that brought out the heat wave." Heh. I can't help it. I'm good like that. So Damian, shush your whining. At least you have A/C... not AC/DC though... You SHOOK ME ALL NIGHT LONG!!!!

New Strings - Miranda Lambert

I bet this road will take me out of here
Take me far away from Amarillo
I bet this car will go real fast
The wheels might even drive me past
The places that you said I'd never go
Oh...

The Texas Sky is the biggest one I've seen
But it still aint big enough for you and me
All the things that make you mad,
All the baggage in your past
Don't leave much room for a girl like me to be
So I'll fill her up with hope and worn-out dreams

An I'll grab the wheel and point it west
Pack the good and leave the rest
I'll drive until I find the missing piece
You said I wouldn't get too far on a tank of gas
And an empty heart
But I have everything I'll ever need
I got this old guitar and a brand new set of strings

Mama said I never should have done it
Should have ended us before we ever started
Daddy knew about my pride so he stood there
And he smiled inside and I pretended that I
Didn't notice a little tear that fell when I said I was going

I've worried about life and
If it's arriving right on time
I guess if you don't jump
You'll never know if you can fly

Glamorous Lifestyles of the Working Class

I'd like to say that I haven't kept this blog up to date because well I've been busy having fun. While there is some truth to that statement and I am having a blast, I'm also doing a considerable amount of work. Yes. I know. ME?!? Work!!??!? Who would have thought it? Right now however, I find myself in a lull period. So what did I decide to do? Oh yes. You guessed it, expense reports. So off I go into the depths of my double-wide suitcase to unearth mounds of crumpled receipts for everything from flowers (a different story for a different day) to dinners to ahem... drinks to taxis. As I sit here quietly at my desk pondering my life away, I realize that I now have to figure out how to enter in hotel expenses where the hotel bill is in Sterling or Euros and my Credit Card shows US Dollars. Euros isn't so difficult. But finding the right exchange rate is unbelievably painful, especially knowing that I have to break out the bill by food, room rate, and taxes. YIPPEE. I lead such a glorious life. Be jealous. Swim in it until your fingers get all pringley.

Bad Luck

It's been universally decided that I am bad luck. With the World Cup going on in Germany, I have been a decidedly unfavorable fan of the home teams. While in London between my Copenhagen and Munchen engagements, I watched England lose in penalties to Italia. THEN to top it off, I was in Muchen watching Germany lose to Italia. The Germans are wanting to send me to Italia for the finals since I seem to be bad luck for the home country teams. They're officially kicking me out of the country.